By Michael Barbieri***How on earth do I write this review?! David Dean Bottrell’s show, David Dean Bottrell Makes Love at The Triad Theater is one of the funniest, most touching and at times, one of the filthiest cabaret acts I’ve ever witnessed! I want to write about everything, yet I don’t want to spoil any of the delicious surprises in store. Needless to say, this show is a must see! Whether you, like Bottrell and myself, are a gay man of a certain age, or just a worldly adult of any sexual persuasion, you’ll find much to laugh about in the evening. You 
might possibly even shed a knowing tear or two along the way.
David Dean Bottrell is an actor who’s appeared on a great many shows, including “Modern Family,” “Law & Order” (the new one), “Law & Order: SVU,” “Mad Men,” “CSI,” “True Blood,” “NCIS,” “Days of Our Lives” and “Ugly Betty.” Most notably, he played the creepy Lincoln Meyer on season three of “Boston Legal.” He’s a screenwriter, having written the screenplay for Fox Searchlight’s hit Kingdom Come and he’s also the author of a new book, Working Actor: Breaking in, Making a Living, and Making a Life in the Fabulous Trenches of Show Business. Beyond all of this, however, he is a storyteller. And a phenomenal storyteller at that! David Dean Bottrell Makes Love chronicles his search for love… in all its many forms:romantic love, family love, sexual love and maybe even self-love.
His opening story set the tone hilariously. “All He Wanted,” tells the tale of a true sexual misadventure. Referring to himself as Our Hero, all he wanted was a quick BJ. And if you don’t know what that stands for, you may not actually be old enough to see this show. Nevertheless, he has answered a personals ad and gone to meet his anonymous partner in his dimly lit apartment. When the gentleman emerges from the shadows, it becomes clear that he’s not exactly as he described in the ad! 
Things…umm…go down…from there! As he attempts to make a quick escape, he unfortunately runs into someone he knows and tries to cover his tracks with a ludicrous story, so as not to be perceived as “an old slut who answers Craigslist ads!”
Throughout the evening, we got a story of a futile sexual encounter with a woman, leading to the realization “I am so GAY!!!” We heard about his experience in a psychiatric hospital at age 19, and the straight, married male nurse who took a liking to him—yes, in THAT way! And we heard about his friendship with a little neighbor girl named Mimi who becomes insanely jealous when she’s replaced by a little neighbor boy named Dougie! “Bobby and Kyle” is a screamingly funny account of two young men who meet in a bar, make out, go home and have fabulous sex. The morning after, however, there’s an unfortunate ”whoopsie” that is just too funny to reveal!
“A Thang in the World” tells of the death of his father and his subsequent dealings with his distant mother and bat-shit crazy sister… who’s not really his sister. And “The Price of Admission” relates his long-term 
relationship with an alcoholic actor. These two pieces are, by turns, side-splittingly funny and heart-breakingly sad, yet completely relatable to anyone straight or gay! These two amusing, yet touching monologues added a lovely balance to the laugh-out-loud humor of the rest of the evening.
The magic in this show is in hearing Bottrell tell the stories. Watching his performance, I have no doubt that they’re all absolutely true—even the one he swears is NOT about him! His honest, straightforward delivery is so winning and affable, even when discussing some very adult subjects. And although there were a couple of minor technical gaffes during that opening night show, he handled them so well, it actually made his performance that much more real and likable! Kudos also to Guy Stroman, whose direction was so natural and subtle, it all felt as though Bottrell was in his own living room simply chatting with us.
David Dean Bottrell Makes Love is a must see! Run, don’t walk, to The Triad! Get to know David Dean Bottrell and you too might just end up… loving him!
Bottrell will be appearing at the Triad Theater (158 West 72nd St., NYC) throughout April and May (April 13th, 20th, and 27th – May 4th, 11th, and 18th), with an additional performance June 1st. All shows are at 7 PM.
All photos by Michael Barbieri
